Your Wedding Photos aren’t About Looking Perfect
One of the first things I often hear from potential clients are the words: “We’re awkward in front of the camera.” And every time, I want to say the same thing of “It’s okay, your wedding photos were never meant to be a performance.”
Somewhere along the way, we started feeling like we have to always look perfect in front of the camera, know exactly how to pose, and create this beautiful charismatic atmosphere. We see influencers and celebrities and automatically think that it’s normal for everything to look effortless… but what’s actually normal is not knowing exactly how to stand every moment throughout your day. And the crazy part? You shouldn’t be curating every moment of your wedding day anyways.
You don’t have to be “photogenic”
The truth is, being “photogenic” comes down to trust. A photo captures one split moment in time, and the reality is, a good photographer is going to understand their camera and be able to capture the moment that best portrays the situation at hand. Couples who look effortless aren’t necessarily models – they’re present and aren’t afraid of being perceived.
Where trust comes in is believing your photographer when they say to just be in the moment, “forget I’m even here!” A photographer’s job isn’t to make people perform on their wedding day, it’s to take each authentic moment and create art.
The goal isn’t posing, it’s connection
While there will inevitably be times throughout the day dedicated to smiling at the camera, the majority of the day should not revolve around getting the shot. A pose is used with the intent of conveying a curated emotion or moment: “Stand here, smile at the camera… ok now look to your left” Because while these will inevitably be used to get those framed photos, on a day designed specifically to celebrate love and union, it shouldn’t be used to curate it to an audience, but instead to capture this love.
A gallery that prioritizes the connection between the bride and groom is for the bride and groom to be reminded of how it all felt. Thus, the goal was never to worry about creating an objectively perfect facade, rather to be able to reminiscence on a day that felt perfect to you.
The imperfect moments are the ones you keep
To be completely honest, I’d sometimes wonder why my clients posted the photos that they did. I’d think to myself: “these aren’t the editorial ones we spent so much time planning and putting together?” But one day it hit me, their wedding day was never about the shot lists. The father wiping his tears away as he sees his little girl in her dress, the nephews and nieces dancing together in the corner because they felt bored, the childhood best friend whose lip quivered as she was giving her speech… these are the moments that will be remembered and treasured forever.
A photographers job is once again not to create a facade of the day. The imperfect, authentic moments are the ones worth capturing the most. And while you scroll through Instagram wondering if your wedding will look like the cover of vogue, that doesn’t matter because a great photographer will take the moment as it’s happening, and create art – not alter it into something that never happened.
Your photographer’s job is to create comfort
Just as an author adapts the scene to their characters, your photographers job is to create comfort by tailoring the moments to their subject. This can happen by reading personalities, knowing when to give direction or when to step back, and sensing what the current atmosphere calls for. A good photographer doesn’t expect you to arrive knowing how to be photographed. That’s part of what you’re hiring them for.
Photos aren’t meant to prove that you had a beautiful day, they’re meant to bring you back to one. SO it’s ok, your wedding photos were never meant to be a performance.
All the best,
Laura Ringstaff
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